Little Off the Top

My fiancé is rarely impressed with my manliness. Not that living in a Brooklyn brownstone requires an overwhelming amount of machismo. But somehow, she is less impressed with my metro sexual wardrobe, taste in white wine, and ability to prepare Tiradito, than the few occasions where I primitively fend for myself. If I had known impressing women would be as easy as chopping wood, wearing the same clothes for three days, and smelling like fire….well I could have saved myself a lot of time and money.

This isn’t to say that I’m not highly focused on my own self reliance, (as much as a urbanite can be) but somehow gardening, canning, and soap making while impressive to me, don’t seem to be held in as high of regard as activities involving dirt, sweat, and firearms.

Now while my family’s upstate hunting cabin does provide ample opportunity for these displays of rugged testosterone, as well as insight into my neurosis as I plan to take it off grid…..our infrequent visits there have rendered the idea of keeping livestock….well mute.

So when my sister in law asked if I wanted to attend the annual sheep shearing at her parents’ home, I jumped at the opportunity. Now to set the stage, the house is more Martha Stewart than Malboro man, but when it comes to manliness, her Italian born father, easily 30 years my senior, with the energy of a 17 year old, and the grip of a mountain gorilla, ranks pretty high on the list.

While most lamb are slaughtered before they reach six months of age, you can’t get lamb without properly caring for adult sheep, something my brother and I realized might be slightly more difficult than planned as we cornered and attempted to capture the first 200 pound Hampshire ewe. Let’s be honest, it wasn’t pretty, and I felt a bit like a citiot, but by the time we got to the second, much smaller Dorset, we pseudo had it down. I am not sure if I was more help or hindrance, but I suppose I’ll know if my invitation does not arrive next year….either way, at the end of the weekend, I can say, I sheared sheep….what the hell did you do?

Following the wishes of my sister in law’s sister in law, the below is not in fact a recipe for lamb, but a very animal friendly veggie burger, that wasn’t half bad.

Local Lamb with a Foreign Flavor

In the last 18 months, eight thousand, four hundred, and ninety nine people have viewed my yelp profile, during which time I have failed to write a single review. Despite the fact that people seem to like what I have to say, I've grown tirelessly bored of writing reviews and have sadly morphed into what can only be described as a disenchanted foodie. This isn't to say that I don't like dining out, because I've had some amazing meals recently, but Michelin star chefs aside, when it comes down to it, "the great thing about foie gras, is that it's foie gras."

Yet, like every junkie, I simply can't put the needle down, best I can hope for is to change up the cocktail, maybe step it up a notch. And in the process of working on that recipe, I've come across some do it yourselfers with PHDs, survivalists with crazy ideas on the rapture, and some back to the earth farmers raising some of the best product I've ever seen. Grass finished beef and lamb isn't just better for you, but it has a flavor that can't even be compared to the mass produced factory style protein coming out of our nations CAFOs. The below recipe is Israeli, and used lamb shoulder from Spring Lake Farms, which I was able to obtain as a member of meatshare.com. While I can't say enough nice things about Spring Lake farm, or the animals that they raise, it's probably best that you read about them here or for the illiterate, watch this great short film about them here.

Ingredients (Serves 4-6)
2 lbs 4 oz fresh lamb, chopped or ground
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 hot green pepper, chopped
1 tsp salt
1/2 tablespoon baharat spice mix (below)
4-5 large ripe tomatoes
2 onions, quartered
Pita dough, below

Mix the lamb, hot pepper, garlic, salt, and baharat seasoning into oval kebabs and grill along with the quartered onions. Roast the tomatoes and chop coarsely.

Transfer even assortments of lamb, onion, and tomatoes into oven safe dishes and entirely wrap in pita dough, rolled out to roughly a 1/4 inch thickness. Sprinkle with sesame seeds and place in a 400 degree oven for roughly ten minutes or until the pita is evenly browned.

Baharat Spice Mix
1 tbsp ground cardamom
1 tbsp black pepper
1/2 tbsp ground allspice
1 tbsp ground cinnamon
1 tbsp ground ginger
1/2 tbsp ground nutmeg

Pita Dough
1 3/4 c bread flour
1/2 oz yeast
3/4 c water
1/2 tbsp honey
1/2 tbsp salt
1 tbsp olive oil

Combine in a mixer and knead with a bread hook for roughly 10 minutes, transfer to a large bowl and allow to rise for 30+ minutes before rolling it out.


****Making goat cheese and "Milk and Honey" soap today.....we'll see how that goes.